Figuring out Peri(menopause) was the problem
(And if you're easily offended by colorful language, this may not be the best site for you 😉)
The unraveling
It wasn't just one thing all at once. It was food cravings that I'd had under control for a decade with dietary adjustments, lifestyle changes, and therapy (you can't binge on cookies if they aren't in the house). It was the increasing frequency and intensity of migraines that had also been well-managed for 15 years with similar changes — no daily meds, not even a rescue med, just the occasional OTC, a dark room, and an icepack maybe 3-4 times a year.
The food cravings got so bad my psychiatrist put me on a medicine mostly used for addiction. And you know what? It worked. It was rough at first, but it worked, and I was able to make healthy food choices again, enjoy aerial yoga. But I was still having issues with my neck triggering migraines, and to stave off potential spinal surgery down the road, I opted for another breast reduction. I'd had one when I was younger, but this time, the recovery was brutal. I couldn't exercise for months, and I couldn't tolerate the food craving medicine anymore, so I had to stop taking it.
At my 24-hour post-op appointment, I was crying from intense nerve pain and upset that they were still large in my opinion — and that fucker told me I just needed to lose more weight. After a lifetime of body image issues, "dieting" off and on since I was 8 years old (hello friends who were also teens in the 90s era of waif-thin starlets), this comment was brutal.
Shortly followed by medical gaslighting from my PCP around these symptoms. Perimenopause was brushed off since my periods were still "normal-to-me." Just take some extra NSAIDs for that pain that makes you curl into a ball and want to die about every third period, and you'll be fine. Your labs are normal. Let's increase your antidepressants — but not your anxiety med — and try meditating more. 🙄
When migraines went from annoyance to emergency
We spent 4 months jumping through insurance hoops to get an expensive preventative migraine medicine approved since my migraines went from 3-4 times a year to 2-3 each week. They were completely debilitating. Nausea, vomiting, extreme light and sound sensitivity. If I didn't already work for myself, I'm sure I wouldn't have been able to work at all.
All the while, I was struggling so hard. The weight packed on effortlessly — about 30 lbs in the 18 months following surgery. So at every doctor's appointment, I was at a new all-time high. And the kicker: after the 3rd or 4th visit in a 2-year span, nothing was said about my weight in person, but the after-visit notes labeled me as "obese."
Now I was pissed. And hot.
Did I mention I've always hated living in the south because I'm always hot, even as a kid? Summers here are nearly unbearable. I get Seasonal Affective Disorder in the summer because I'm stuck inside in the air conditioning — going outside is miserably hot, and overheating is a migraine trigger for me. Throw in hot flashes — why is it even called a flash if it lasts for HOURS?! — and here's a fun new twist: I can't drink a single glass of wine without it bringing on a hot flash. So much for that coping mechanism. Ugh.
The two pages that changed everything
After multiple internet searches, I came across Dr. Mary Claire Haver's book, The New Menopause. The mind-blowing-aha-wtf moment I had when I got to the TWO pages that list all the symptoms that can occur during perimenopause absolutely blew me away. Itchy ears? Migraines? Irritability? Rage? Depression? Weight gain? Sleep issues? Waking up around 3am almost every night? YES. It's me.
I finished that book quickly, put myself on the library waitlist for several more books about women's health — specifically perimenopause, written by medical professionals — and dug into the latest developments. Once I read that bio-identical hormone replacement therapy was not only helpful for all the shitty symptoms I was experiencing but also beneficial for reducing my chances of developing additional medical conditions in the future, I jumped in.
I found an online provider, and a week later, my personalized HRT prescriptions were in my mailbox. The first night, I slept better than I had in months. It still wasn't great, but 4 uninterrupted hours was wonderful.
Hot flashes calmed down in the first few months. Irritability began to lessen. Desire for alcohol? Gone. Sleep can still be a struggle — I'm still working on a reliable routine there, stay tuned. But the biggest bonus: after about a year on HRT, I was able to wean off the preventive migraine med and only use the rescue med as needed. I'm down to maybe 1-2 migraines a month. Which is wonderful, since our health insurance decided to no longer cover that medicine. Hard eye roll for the American medical system in general.
The GLP-1 question
Even after adjusting my HRT dosage, I was struggling with food noise and zero desire to be active because I still overheat easily — and that "o" word from the doctor's office was clanging around in my head. I brought this concern to my HRT provider, and she immediately suggested a GLP-1 med.
I balked. I've seen worrisome stuff about side effects, and isn't that... cheating?
Good grief, the way I've been programmed to talk to myself. Even with years of therapy and a personal growth and healing journey, the old tapes still play — judgment around my inability to control my diet. I'd even started working toward a master's in nutrition in my early 30s, completed about a third of the coursework before realizing it wasn't the right path. So I KNOW what to do food and exercise-wise. I know what's worked for me in the past. But I can no longer force myself to do things I hate. And I hated the restrictive eating, exercise, overheat-into-migraine cycle that was just no longer worth it to me.
My values are changing as I go through this change, at the same time our society is in upheaval and everything just feels INTENSE, and I feel helpless all the time.
Luckily, around that time, Dr. Haver did a podcast with endocrinologist Dr. Rocio Salas-Whalen, who has extensive experience with GLP-1 meds. After watching both parts, I messaged my provider, and she referred me to Willow for a consult. My provider there was great about giving me all the pertinent information — protein intake, dietary adjustments, side effect expectations, strength training.
I'm using the orally dissolvable tablets. The first week was an adjustment period of learning what foods I can and cannot eat. I had some nausea the first 3 days, but the companion nausea med worked, and I haven't really needed it since.
What a game changer this medicine has been for me. The food noise? Gone. Conscious choice ability activated. I stay off the scale — it took me years to win that battle of obsessing multiple times a day about my weight, and I don't want to go there again — but I can see how my body is changing. I feel more comfortable in my clothes again. I have the mental capacity to focus on projects again now that I'm not constantly trying to distract myself from food noise. Something I didn't even realize I'd been doing until I didn't need to do it anymore.
I'm cautiously optimistic.
Why I'm here
It's been a long road. I experienced 3 years of awful symptoms and being gaslit by medical professionals before I realized they were all related to perimenopause. I've been on HRT for about a year and a half now. I still follow multiple female physicians on social media to stay up to date, and I read new books as they come out.
Balance is a constantly moving target as we navigate "the change," as my grandma called it. I'm always trying new things when something no longer works or a new challenge pops up.
I'm going to document some of those things on this site for my fellow pajama mamas. After all, we're in this together — and no matter how varied our experiences, we can shrug and know: that's just peri.
What We Stand For
That's Just Peri exists because women deserve better.
Better information. Better products. Better care. And a better answer than "it's probably just stress" when your body starts changing and no one will tell you why.
This platform was built on a set of values that guide everything — every article, every product recommendation, every brand partnership, every word. Here's what we believe.
We believe women's health is not optional.
Perimenopause affects every woman, and yet most enter it with almost no preparation, no guidance, and no support from the medical systems that are supposed to serve them. We exist to change that — with honest, evidence-based information that treats you like the intelligent adult you are.
We believe in bodily autonomy.
Your body, your decisions. We will never tell you what to do with your health. We will give you the best information we can find so you can make your own choices — about HRT, supplements, nutrition, movement, and everything else. We trust you.
We believe every person deserves to be seen.
Perimenopause doesn't only happen to cisgender women. Trans men, nonbinary people, and others experience it too. Our language reflects that. Our recommendations reflect that. Everyone navigating this transition is welcome here — every identity, every body, every background, every orientation.
We believe in science without gatekeeping.
We recommend products and practices that are evidence-based. We don't promote pseudoscience, fear-based marketing, or miracle cures. But we also don't dismiss traditional, holistic, or complementary approaches when the evidence supports them. Science should empower you, not intimidate you.
We believe who makes your products matters.
We actively seek out brands that are women-founded, BIPOC-owned, LGBTQIA+-affirming, cruelty-free, and transparent about their ingredients and sourcing. We believe the wellness industry should be led by the communities it serves — not exploited by corporations that see your symptoms as a revenue opportunity.
We believe your trust is sacred.
Every product recommended on That's Just Peri has been vetted through a values-first framework. We ask: Is this brand ethical? Are the ingredients clean and transparent? Is the science real? Would I recommend this to my best friend at 3am when she can't sleep and doesn't know why?
If the answer to any of those is no, it doesn't appear here. No matter the commission.
We believe in transparency.
This site earns income through affiliate partnerships — when you purchase a product through our links, we may earn a small commission at no extra cost to you. But here's what makes us different: we choose our partners based on values first, revenue second.
We don't work with Amazon. We don't promote brands that use shame-based marketing. We don't recommend products from companies that fund causes that harm women, LGBTQIA+ communities, or marginalized people. Every affiliate partner on this site has been vetted not just for product quality, but for who they are, how they treat people, and what they stand for.